are you still at the devil's house?
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
