His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
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