i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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