I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
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