Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
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