Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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