Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I wear drunk well.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
