So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
