yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I am available for nakedness
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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