I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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