Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize