ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize