I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Randomize
