I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Randomize
