I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
