I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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