I need help removing her.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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