Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
