i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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