they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize