You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
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