whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
did you just send me my own nude
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
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