So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
