My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing