that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
