life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
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