He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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