She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
