"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
You were trust falling into bushes
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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