Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
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