Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Enjoy the penises
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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