My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
