whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
