The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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