did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
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