Pappa wants mamma naked
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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