Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
