Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
