I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
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Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
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I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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