Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
