Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(919): View more from North Carolina

great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with

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(630): View more from Illinois

i would rim the shit out of meg ryan

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(803): View more from South Carolina

Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.

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(256): View more from Alabama

I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(719): View more from Colorado

just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?

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(651): View more from Minnesota

I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!

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(425): View more from Washington

I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.

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(407): View more from Florida

There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?

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