if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.