If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
This is the high leading the old right now
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
He did a backflip because drugs
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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