Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(208): View more from Idaho

Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.

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(208): Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes. http://tfl.nu/oxm0

Replies (5) Good night (839) Bad night (3137)
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(770): View more from Georgia

He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.

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(770): He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle. http://tfl.nu/uuu6

Replies (15) Good night (6456) Bad night (695)
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(567): View more from Ohio

I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..

(1-567): View more from Ohio

How so?

(567): View more from Ohio

Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.

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(567): I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand.. (1-567): How so? (567): Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours. http://tfl.nu/38h3

Replies (9) Good night (946) Bad night (3954)
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(469): View more from Texas

I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.

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(469): I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom. http://tfl.nu/d1jb

Replies (9) Good night (869) Bad night (3005)
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(516): View more from New York

This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.

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(516): This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me. http://tfl.nu/6e09

Replies (8) Good night (2909) Bad night (726)
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(443): View more from Maryland

she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.

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(443): she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise. http://tfl.nu/igb9

Replies (9) Good night (2243) Bad night (721)
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(954): View more from Florida

You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.

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(954): You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself. http://tfl.nu/qx75

Replies (6) Good night (926) Bad night (3086)
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(504): View more from Louisiana

I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?

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(504): I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game? http://tfl.nu/ymnf

Replies (7) Good night (1039) Bad night (475)
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(303): View more from Colorado

We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...

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(303): We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes... http://tfl.nu/lait

Replies (6) Good night (472) Bad night (1308)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...

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(615): He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing... http://tfl.nu/wirp

Replies (13) Good night (436) Bad night (1965)
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(229): View more from Georgia

Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..

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(229): Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it .. http://tfl.nu/xli3

Replies (11) Good night (2818) Bad night (652)
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(218): View more from Minnesota

WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!

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(218): WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!! http://tfl.nu/3vs3

Replies (6) Good night (669) Bad night (406)
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(425): View more from Washington

I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me

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(425): I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me http://tfl.nu/4rz8

Replies (4) Good night (621) Bad night (245)
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(248): View more from Michigan

Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum

(1-248): View more from Michigan

You pretty much did tho

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(248): Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum (1-248): You pretty much did tho http://tfl.nu/fp9x

Replies (1) Good night (693) Bad night (195)
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(305): View more from Florida

I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.

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(305): I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night. http://tfl.nu/aqrx

Replies (3) Good night (202) Bad night (498)

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