Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(810): View more from Michigan

I must be too annoying 4 u.

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(949): View more from California

I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(860): View more from Connecticut

There is too much vodka and too much dick.

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(209): View more from California

There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.

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(817): View more from Texas

Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.

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(518): View more from New York

I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .

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