Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
