I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
