i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
