Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
