there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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