Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize