well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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