well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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